MDE. Their range is superb, they are well made, I have knocked the crap out of mine and they are hardly scratched. When I went from 300bar to 232bar cylinders I took a hammer to an old MDE 300bar DIN valve: the knob did not break, the stem did not warp, the body got a bit bashed but the threads/orifice did not warp either. Bombproof and available everywhere, surprisingly inexpensive.

Contact: MDE, 57 Sparkenhoe Street, Leicester, LE2 0TD. 0116 262 4262

or

Scubapro if you are feeling flush. www.scubapro.co.uk
Theirs have barrel o-rings in the manifold, a bit more resilient to twisting and thumping. MDE use face o-rings which can be dislodged in theory. I have not yet suffered any leaks with a MDE manifold.

For most dives 2x12litre cylinders are best, or 15litres. 10litre bottles are a little too small for most situations. For a cave dive, consider 18's or 20's.

Use steel with a drysuit or aluminium with a wetsuit.

Luxfer 7 litre or 12 litre aluminium bottles. Bin the crap Apeks valves that come with them and replace them with MDE or Scubapro 232bar DIN valves. Avoid the 10 litres at all costs, and do not buy second-hand unless they are recent. They should come O2 clean from the distributor.

In the US, AL80's are the perfect size, buy as many as you can and ship them to the UK! Just make sure the crappy burst disk tank valves are replaced with European non-burst disk valves.

Contact: Sea & Sea, sales@sea-and-sea-ltd.demon.co.uk; Philip House, Aspen Way, Paignton, Devon, TQ4 7QR, UK.

Apeks, without a doubt. My recommendation is the TX40. The TX100 is over-priced and the TX50 is exactly the same reg as the TX40. The only difference is that there is an adjustment knob on the TX50 but the TX40 has a hex socket instead. They are a superb, consistent breathe throughout the water column, ultra-reliable (I have a seven year old T40 which has never been serviced -- I still use it as a bottom regulator) and excellent value. They take standard Scubapro-type hose fittings and the 2nd stage can be pulled apart and cleaned in seconds, even underwater. Servicing charges are minimal too. Diving & Marine Services in Manchester knock them out for about 160UKP -- don't pay more than 180UKP for one, you're being ripped off.

Poseidon Cyklones are very nice too, especially an older one that has been well looked after. They can be pulled apart in seconds and rebuilt underwater far easier than any other reg, which is why they are liked by sump divers. Cyklones are an excellent breathe throughout the water column and especially good in warm water.

Contact: Apeks Marine Equipment Ltd., Neptune Way, Blackburn, Lancashire, BB1 2BT; info@apeks.co.uk; www.apeks.co.uk

Michael Dunning at Aquatech on the Isle of Man. For custom hoses, he is your man, and an ex-WKPP member to boot. He knows his stuff and the hoses are excellent, using Apeks stock.

Contact: Michael Dunning, Aquatech Diving Services, ; aquatech@mcb.net

There are a few good manufacturers around. There are many independant fabricators and the plans are available on the web too. The quality varies from fabricator to fabricator, some are good, others not so. Of the big companies, Dive Rite's aluminium backplates are good -- but aluminium wears around the bolt holes, always use big, wide washers. For stainless steel, try Halcyon, AUL or Scubapro (I can recommend the Scubapro's heartily). OMS are alright provided you throw away the wings and the harness and keep just the backplate. Dive Rite ABS plastic plates are real stinkers!

Contact: Halcyon; www.halcyon.net
AUL; www.aulinc.com
Dive Rite: as for Luxfer
Scubapro; as above
OMS; PO Box 146, Montgomery, NY 12549, USA.

The black, two inch stuff. Get it from climbing shops.

Use a one piece webbing harness with no breaks. You may thank me one day.

Recreational use: Halcyon or the Dive Rite Junior
Advanced diving: Halcyon

Very tough, the corrugated hose is in the right place, the outer coating is a non-stretch material so it does not deflate the wing if you get a leak. A nicely made piece of work. Pricey, but worth it. Let it be your piece of luxury.

See above for Halcyon.
Dive Rite, www.diverite.com or Sea & Sea in the UK

Generic Italian HP gauge, quite small, comes with a yellow rubber coated brass case and a protector around the swivel. No maker's marks but available in various places. Well marked dial and very easy to read, nice size, and very cheap. Keep an eye out for them.

Bear in mind most gauges are made at the same factory in Italy and badged up for the various makers, so shop around for the best deal if you cannot get the little yellow thingies above.

Diving & Marine Services, Church Road, Urmston, Manchester, UK, supply the yellow gauges.

Must be an umbilical light. Test tube light heads are best. I use AUL Spectrum 14's, excellent: four hour burn on 50W or half that on 100W. Sealed lead acid batteries are the most serviceable and reliable. The small Meteor 4's are a good choice for shorter dives.

AUL: www.aulinc.com

Twist-on are best, avoid mechanical switched lights. Halcyon Scout lights look indestructable, but at a price -- they are very expensive and considering my predisposition to losing stuff I decided not to buy them. They run a UK SL4 bulb unit but do it off three batteries instead of four, so there is less chance of blowing the bulb.

My alternative is the Pelican Super Sabre Lite. Again it runs a similar bulb off three batteries and is a twist-on. They are designed for industrial use in hazardous environments so they are very rugged. My only criticism is that the attachment point for a clip is off centre, but it is a niggle, not a problem. About 28UKP each if you order them over the internet.

Pelican: www.pelicases.co.uk or www.pelican.com outside the UK

Super-Snips, about 4UKP a pair. Industrial scissors, will cut anything, and at that price, who cares if they rust (which they will not if you look after them). Available at Maplin shops, or ironmongers everywhere.

A more luxurious alternative, Wilkinson Sword gardening snips, spring loaded for one handed use, very sharp, very strong, and have resisted rust for about a year. They even have a lanyard hole. At least one diving manufacturer rebadges them and doubles the price. Around 12UKP from B & Q, Homebase or gardening centres.

Dive Rite Z-Knives are about the only practical way to sharpen a pencil underwater.

I use the generic fins found in bargain bins in dive shops and I can out swim most people in them.

See Fins for what I use. Too individual to recommend one brand. Again, most are made by a handful of manufacturers and rebadged.

Go for membrane. Otter Brittanic Super Skins, front entry. A kick-ass suit. Go for their Thinsulate undersuits.

Otter: Otter Buildings, Douglas Mills, Bowling Old Lane, Bradford, BD5 7JR, UK; sales@drysuits.co.uk

Most use the same processor chip. I avoid them like the plague, but for recreational trips (single cylinder, no deco stuff) I use a Suunto Companion or an Uwatec Aladin Pro at a push.

www.suunto.fi

Old series Aladin Pros as they had a much deeper depth readout. Uwatec timers are a good choice, very cheap but you cannot replace the battery.

I use Dive Rite but I remove the huge handles. I am left with just a spool on an axle which is attached to a bit of frame to give you something to hold, plus it has the locking screw.

Recently, I've started liking plain spools by Extreme Exposure/Halcyon.

Dive Rite multi-page slates. Small, like a little, plastic notepad. Get rid of the cover, it has a Dive Rite logo on the front and is made from a different material so you cannot use either side to write on.

Buena Vista Social Club. Coolest album around, perfect for a chilled drive to a quiet shore dive.

Leftfield, Rhythm & Stealth; Underworld, Beaucoup Fish; Prodigy, Fat of the Land. Ideal for early morning starts, and high-speed runs along the motorway to catch a boat.

Live, Secret Samadhi; Red Hot Chilli Peppers, One Hot Minute; Placebo, Without You I'm Nothing. General purpose cool sounds to get you in the mood to dive.

Radio One, only one choice, Mark & Lard in the afternoon. Worth sitting out a dive to listen to them. They are the masters, and Fat Harry White is a hero of lurve. Sarah Cox for a good start in the morning, Jo Wiley's Lunchtime Social for surface intervals, John Peel for the drive home after a night dive.

Radio Two, Jonathan Ross on a Saturday morning, otherwise avoid on pain of death.

Radio Four, superb for post-dive intellectualism for impressing your mates in the pub with. Informative, intriguing and some of the plays are excellent.

Radio Scotland, the Velvet Cabaret, times vary. Funniest thing around, superb comedy.

Mitsubishi 2.5TD L200 Double Cab is my current dive-mobile of choice. 4x4, loads of room and decent stereo

Subaru Impreza 2litre Estate. Ultra-reliable and with permanent four wheel drive. The turbo models are frightening. Very expensive to insure.

Old series Honda Prelude. 2.3i auto with leather seats and full electric pack. Ideal for the rebreather diver as there is absolutely no space. Very fast, very reliable and the fuel economy is excellent for the engine size.

Mercedes Vito van. Must be silver, the epitomy of cool, but crap stereo.

Volkswagen Transporter. See above, better colour range and stereos.